Wave of light keeps memories alive

Wave of light keeps memories alive

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There are some things that just cannot be fully understood unless you have experienced them: The death of a child is one such experience.

But sharing that experience of loss is one way many parents deal with its emotional trauma.

In what has become a worldwide rite, on Sunday 12 November, bereaved parents joined together for a candle lighting service to share their loss in a poignant yet healing ceremony.

The annual Brisbane service is organised by The Compassionate Friends Queensland, a non-profit group of parents who have all experienced the death of a child.

Among other bereaved parents and family members who lit candles for their children, President Vera Caltabiano lit a candle in memory of her son Andrew, killed at the age of 31 in a motorbike accident, after facing the agonising decision of turning off his life support system.

“We are all in same boat; we are all bereaved parents, grandparents and siblings. I would not wish it on anybody – no parent should have to deal with it, no matter what age they are,” she said.

“It helps to be with people who are walking in your shoes, who understand what it’s like. That’s what makes the service such a moving and emotionally cleansing time.”

Held annually on the second Sunday in December, the candle lighting service is a worldwide event uniting family and friends around the globe in lighting candles at 7pm local time for one hour to honour and remember their children.
Vera said the event created a virtual 24-hour wave of light as it passed from time zone to time zone. “We believe it is the largest mass candle lighting on the globe.”

Vera said hundreds of formal candle lighting events were held and thousands of informal candle lightings were conducted in homes as families gathered in quiet remembrance of children who have gone but will never be forgotten. Vera said the service took on an added poignancy at a time of year surrounded by Christmas festivities.

As part of the Brisbane service, poetry or prose submitted by bereaved families was read and songs played before parents were invited to write a message to their child on a small card and place it beside a candle to be lit in memory.

A special part of the night’s service was the barbershop quartet, Vortex, singing ‘An Irish Blessing’.

After the service, people were invited to stay for supper, which included the drawing of the annual Christmas raffle and a selection of songs from the barbershop quartet.

Christmas Hamper Raffle Winners

1st prize: Helen Petzl – DULONG
2nd prize: Peta Weeks – BURLEIGH HEADS
3rd prize: R. Fresswell – MOOROOKA
Thank you to everyone who contributed to this raffle and to those who bought and sold tickets.
Congratulations to our winners and we hope you enjoyed your Christmas goodies!

TCF gratefully acknowledges the following companies and people for their generous contributions to the Christmas Hamper raffle in 2010…

Cr Darren Power—Logan City Council
McDonald’s
Australia Zoo
Sizzler
Nestle Australia Ltd
Alma Park Zoo
Madonna Ryan
Feast on Fruit—Morningside
Arnotts
Brodies Meal Makers
Hungry Jacks
KFC
Haughton’s Oxley Pharmacy
Mango Mick—Cannon Hill
Moreton Bay City Council
Bobby & Vanessa Gilder
Heather Smith
Peter & Rita Taylor
Julie McGregor

(Click photos below for larger version)